Gargi Mehra, 9/29/2014

Current Occupation: Project Manager at a Software Company
Former Occupation: Programmer at a Software Company
Contact Information: Gargi Mehra is a software professional by day and a writer by night. She writes fiction and humor in a determined effort to unite the two sides of the brain in cerebral harmony. Her work has appeared in Page & Spine, Tincture Journal, GlassFire, Bartleby Snopes and Liquid Imagination among other online avenues. She blogs at http://gargimehra.wordpress.com/
 

#

Poetic Cyber-war

The other day I committed a crime – the crime of sending Grace a joke she had read earlier. The following conversation ensued:

 

From: Grace
To: Nina
Cc: Ravi; Sheila

Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

Been there, seen that…send something new!!

Yawn …. 🙂

Regards,

Grace

 

From: Nina
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2013 2:30 PM
To: Grace
Cc: Ravi; Sheila
Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

Apparently I have nothing to send to people who have “been everywhere, seen everything”.

Go back to sleep, Grace. That’s what you do best.

Regards,

Nina

 

From: Grace
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2013 2:41 PM
To: Nina
Cc: Ravi; Sheila
Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

Your tone is accusatory, your words demeaning

I am wide awake, while you were sleeping

Not only had you slept, but loudly you had snored

Now I shall erase your limericks off my board

Though style be lacking, my meaning is plain

The war is on, bring on your best game!

Regards,

Grace

 

From: Nina
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2013 2:50 PM
To: Grace
Cc: Ravi; Sheila
Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

Your poem is pointless,

Your words are stale,

All you are doing,

Is clogging the mail

Erase my words from the board,

But they’ll stay in your mind,

What you really need is,

A big whack on the behind

Empty may be the board,

But my words have made their mark,

Try as you may,

From your mind they won’t depart.

If this is war,

And Ravi is on your side,

Tell me one thing,

Why is he forced to hide?

(Has he gone off

to commit suicide?

– addition by Sheila)

Regards,

Nina

 

From: Grace
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2013 3:32 PM
To: Nina
Cc: Ravi; Sheila
Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

Dear Nina and Sheila,

Ravi is busy with work

A word from which ‘others’ shirk

Obviously you have none

Since you have time for all this fun

Don’t point any fingers at me

I am as busy as can be

I am just obliging you

With a poem or two

Regards,

Grace

From: Ravi
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2013 3:42 PM
To: Nina
Cc: Grace; Sheila
Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

I do not hide

Or "commit" suicide

A meeting was in my duty

You do not understand – what a pity!

 

I take a side

By rules I do not abide

You think you are sitting pretty

Wait till I am free beyond six- thirty!

 

The war is wide

With Grace I shall guide

Poetic bullets in multiples of fifty

And laugh all along – hale and hearty!

 

Cheerio!!!!

Ravi

(Fear not Grace… help is just a click away)

From: Nina
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2013 4:04 PM
To: Ravi
Cc: Grace; Sheila
Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

To Grace:

My dearest busy bee

I’ve already had time to see

That what you claim as work

Brings to my face a mere smirk

Pointing fingers

Is not my task

Try to be yourself

Do not wear a mask.

In the end I ask of you,

Please stop obliging me,

With one poem,

Or even three!

To Ravi:

You do not hide,

You do not by rules abide,

You do not even commit suicide,

It seems that only with Grace you side!

Be brave and face it,

A rhyme isn’t your cup of tea

Because rhyming ‘pretty’ and ‘thirty’

Is even worse than ‘duty’ and ‘pity’

A spine you have none,

For else you would know,

The war has already been won,

But we (Sheila and I) are too modest to let our victory show!!

Regards,

Nina

 

From: Ravi
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2013 4:55 PM
To: Nina
Cc: Grace; Sheila
Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

Using volume of words you cannot win

Quality and not Quantity is the right spin

Bowling googlies and copying verse

Don’t you have a better way- something terse??

 

From: Nina
Sent: Wednesday, October 06, 2013 5:04 PM
To: Ravi
Cc: Grace; Sheila
Subject: RE: Man walks into bar

Finally, Ravi, you did it,

You wrote some real rhymes,

As you can see from this verse,

I can be terse sometimes

Regards,

Nina