iDrew, 12/26/2011

Current Occupation: Call Centre Operator / Customer Relations

Former Occupation: Retail Sales for a High Street Fashion Store

Contact Information: Writing under the name of iDrew to co-ordinate with her titles, Essex girl Drew has previously been published in various magazines such as: ‘The Delinquent’, ‘Battered Suitcase’, and ‘All Things Girl’. She enjoys shopping, boys and clubs but claims these are all merely research for her writing. She is also one of the founding members of the Clueless Collective and can be found at: www.cluelesscollective.co.uk where her free to download chapbook is available . She also recently found herself on Purple Patch’s ‘Best Poets of the Small Press 2011’.

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iMistlekiss

i hate that combination of mistletoe

and the office party

gross sweaty accountant blokes

in hand knit cardigans

with their beery breath or

smooth talking sales execs

drenched in after shave

and a love of themselves

think mistletoe has magic qualities

that when activated by a wet slobbery

snog i will somehow automatically

develop an uncontrollable urge to

join them in a travelogue bed or

more likely a quickie in

the stationery cupboard

devastated no such charm exists

they resort to groping my bum

some even try for a handful of tit

boss or no boss they get a

sharp kick on the shin

i hate mistletoe

it fills me with dread

but then

very occasionally

oh my god good will to all men

and drew

the magic does seem to work

from the admin department

in strolls my christmas bonus

and i get a present i

deffo want to unwrap

before christmas morning